I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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