am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Randomize
