Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize
