Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Randomize
