is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
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