What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
My breasts were aching with rage.
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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