The maid of honor just puked.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?