Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
is wine microwaveable?
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Randomize
