You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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