I wish I could punch you in the face.
I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
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