He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
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