i just found a plastic monkey in my sweatshirt pocket
Umm I had a plastic mermaid in my pants......
Really
You win
Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
i would punch a child for taco bell
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
This is classic penis vs brain.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
I pour the whiskey from now on
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize
