Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
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