i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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