...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
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