Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
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