So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Randomize