Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
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