butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Randomize
