He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Randomize
