Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
tell me about the fingering
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