who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Randomize
