I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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