i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
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