This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
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