you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
