is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
