I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Randomize
