Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
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