I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Randomize
