Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Randomize
