I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize
