Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Someone shit on the floor
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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