Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize