Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Randomize
