Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
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