some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
