Dude my mom stole all your condoms
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Randomize
