i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
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Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
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