love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Randomize
