How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
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