Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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