amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
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