Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
He better not be in your backpack
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
