how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
