They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
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