I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
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He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
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