Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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