Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Randomize
