he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
