I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
Randomize
