we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
